Many of us are CONFUSED. We simply don't know any better. And we don't know better because many of us don't know Christ. We confuse a GOOD man & a GODLY man. Let's be clear-there is NO exception to this rule, this standard. Holiness is the only standard we ought to uphold...with & in everything.A GOOD MAN IS A GODLY MAN. What does this mean? In order for a man to be a "good man" he has to exhibit some Christ-like characteristics. The world will tell you a good man doesn't have to be a godly man.
A "good man" (in the carnal mind) is someone who opens the door for you, supports you financially, remains faithful & while that may be true-a good man FEARS THE LORD. We have so many women who are (I have to be honest) desperate to be with someone that they'll accept anything less than what they truly deserve. You were brought with a price...or didn't you know? A man died for you.
Now back to this so called "good man"-so he may open doors, take you out all the time, "provide"...and sleep with you before you two are married, Now does this still make him a "good man?" No.
"23The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way. 24Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand." Psalm 37:23-24
"Praise the LORD! How blessed is the man who fears the LORD, Who greatly delights in His commandments." Psalm 112:1
"A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him." Matthew 12:35
A good man fears the Lord, and walks the path of righteousness. He doesn't date a bunch of women, call you out your name, disrespect you, act selfishly, refuse to love you as Christ loved the church, physically/mentally abuse you, go to church on Sunday...and then openly live sinfully the rest of the week. He doesn't worship you (his girlfriend) more than God, shack up with you, cross boundaries. He's not deceiving you or leading you on. His intentions with you should be crystal clear...why? Because we know real men date with a purpose & that is marriage, and to come together to please God.
My heart breaks for all the women who, in their alone time, cry about a man. I used to be that girl. I was angry, mad, bitter, sad-you name it. It wasn't until I got this revelation: There's something better out there for me than this...THERE IS GOD'S WAY. You don't have to accept that man who refuses to commit to you wholeheartedly. And if he hasn't stated his intent with you, if you haven't seen some good fruit on his tree, WHY ARE YOU EVEN WITH HIM?
Women, my sisters in Christ, if we only understood our true value & worth!!! The value and worth found in the one who created the universe. The one who knew you and I even before we were formed in our mother's belly (Jeremiah 1:5). If we knew, WE WOULD NEVER EXCEPT ANYTHING LESS. All these television shows and worldly garbage will have you thinking it's okay for your "good man" to be at the strip club (every now & then), get drunk every so often, have sex with you, etc.
Sex before marriage is NOT OKAY. I didn't get this until I really got on my face before the Lord. "Lord, what have I been doing?" It is never just sex. You become one with the individual. In other words, we women are on the receiving end. This dawned on me: I had always considered myself a happy person. Majority of the day I was happy. After years of giving my body away, I lost that "happiness" about me. I started to become angrier more & more. I started to think following God wasn't worth my own selfish/fleshly wants. I started to exhibit some of the characteristics of the men I were dating (two become one). I was not bringing them up, but I was going down to their ways. It was because I was separated from Christ, weaker, and susceptible. Anything went, pretty much.
I mean I struggled with this for months! "God, why don't I desire you like I used to?" "God why am I sitting in the very back row of church, when you know I use to always sit in the front?" "God, why do I find excuses to not spend time with you?"
SIN SEPARATES YOU FROM GOD, today, tomorrow, always.
"It's your sins that have cut you off from God. Because of your sins, he has turned away and will not listen anymore." Isaiah 59:2
Make no mistake-God hates sin!
The world may have you thinking that boy you're dating, the one with a college degree, successful, nice, "likes to turn up"-is a good man...he's not. Maybe in a carnal mind? Sure! But life means nothing if you don't know Christ.
"For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul?" Mark 8:36.
All the things of this world are temporary. If your "good man" is so focused on the things of this world MORE than the things of Christ-that's a problem.
A good man fears God right? If he fears God then all that other stuff we women desire is already pre-packaged! Love, respect, unselfishness, purpose, gentleness, faithfulness, leadership...ALL of it! If he doesn't love God with every piece of his life, he will never be able to properly love you. I tried this. & it doesn't work out. I kept cheering for what he did have/what he did do...forgetting the most important-a true love for God. I kept coming up empty, looking for more.
When it comes to a good man versus a godly man, make no mistake, the two are one in the same.
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